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This post could alternatively be titled, “What the F Was I Thinking??!!”. Sure, it all sounded great in theory. The two year old and I pack-up and fly across the country to spend a long weekend visiting friends in California, and we all hop over to Disneyland for a day or two. We’ll have a great time together, and Daddy can go spend time with his friends fishing back at home. Everybody wins! Or do they….?
See, I love the idea of that plan, but to keep this site from sounding too “Polyanna-ish”, here are the real thoughts going through this Mommy’s head with one night to go until “D Day”. I promise I am not a schizophrenic as this stream of consciousness may imply.
- My throat is swollen up and my sinuses are so bad I can barely breathe. Please don’t let me be getting sick. Please don’t let me be getting sick. What will I do if I get really sick on the trip with no one there to help me? Die, probably I will die. They will bury me at sea with Nemo and Friends. Or perhaps add me to the collection of skeletons in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. Little C will be abandoned and thus must join the island of lost
boys, er girls.
- This week, why did I think this was a good week to go to California? This was the worst week ever to pick. I flew out of town for work, my husband went out of town for work, I had pink eye, C had poison oak, our dog got sick, I’m exhausted, the house looks like a tornado went through it, I worked a 16 hour day yesterday, I’m too tired to even think straight, are there even clean clothes to pack (The Man has done a ton of laundry while being home with Little C, but still…), what was I thinking?!
- Little C is thrilled. This is all going to work out. She even told me that toddlers aren’t supposed to cry on planes. She has this mastered. She should probably write a book instructing all the others babies of the world not to cry on planes. This will be fun.
- Disney VIP – why didn’t we sell more things in the garage sale last week and spring for a Disney VIP guide so we can maximize our time, get extra Fast Passes, have less time waiting in line, etc? Clearly that was a strategic error. That has to be worth around eleventy billion dollars, right?! It’s not too late to rob a bank and book a VIP guide. I should probably do that on the way to the airport tomorrow. I think the bank has a drive through.
- Wait a minute, while I am away with the kiddo, my husband gets to lounge around, and sleep in, and fish without any children around? What?! Hmmm, something seems fishy about this deal. Maybe I should take up fishing.
- How I feel sorry for whoever is sitting next to us tomorrow on the plane. Please let it be someone good. Like perhaps a kind grandma who loves toddlers and is hard of hearing. If whoever it is starts giving us the “stink eye”, I may have to send them to time-out. Hmmm, I wonder where time-out is on the airplane?
- I should have probably researched Disneyland more before today. I can tell you where everything is at Disney World….where to go first to get in line, where to go first to get Fast Passes, where to get snacks, where the good bathrooms are, etc. I can pretty much only tell you that Disneyland is in California. Somewhere.
- That’s okay, I can just download a Disneyland app on my iPhone. That will solve everything.
- I will be earning “real” miles and hotel points on the trip – hurray! EQMs make everything a little bit better. Thank goodness for Hyatt Diamond suite upgrades, free breakfast, and lounge access. That should help.
- I sure do wish that the flight tomorrow had E+ seating. All toddlers should be placed at least a minimum distance from the seat in front of them. This should not be optional.
- I have clearly lost my mind. This was the worst idea ever. Why can’t I just sleep all weekend, and wake up only to wander to the couch and watch movies while curled under a blanket sipping hot tea? How will I survive a weekend of crowds, chicken fingers, ketchup, runny noses, tears, dirty diapers, more tears, Dora the Explorer, lines, people, sippy cups, strollers, and more tears. (P.S., the tears are just as likely to be mine as hers).
- Did I pack enough diapers, cash, clothes, and entertainment for the flight? Oh well, if all else fails we can just count the puppies in Sky Mall. There are always lots of dogs and cats in the Sky Mall magazine. Lord help us if there are no puppies in Sky Mall.
- Bed. I should probably get some sleep. I think I can count on my hands the number of hours I have slept in the past few days. Maybe a miracle will occur tomorrow and me and the toddler can both sleep on the plane. She did say that babies nap on planes – do Mommies nap on planes, too? Probably not in Economy. That is probably reserved for First Class, just like the hot towels.